Date: 23rd August 2009 at 6:38pm
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Colchester United F.C. ideally want to tell the whole world that nobody at the club is embittered by Paul Lambert`s departure to Norwich, but hey, most fans actually ARE.

How do I know? Because I am one.

Still, here`s the last word on it for now – we promise.

Vital Colchester has been among the most vocal U’s fanzines on the internet to voice apparently outspoken opinions on Lambert`s demeaning departure this past week, reviewable via the link to an exhaustive rundown of a very hectic seven days for the side.

Lighter, tears – we’ve had the whole shebang!

Steve Wingnall, an ex-U`s manager, may have said he wasn`t at all surprised by what happened and looking back into history, with almost identically mutinies from Phil Parkinson and George Burley before, maybe he was wise not to be.

So, haven`t we kept Lambert and those not-so-neighbourly Norwich in the stocks for long enough, now?

Perhaps.

But yesterday I was enraged to read on the network sister sit, Vital Norwich, that a selection of City fans had the gall to describe us – not the Ipswich supporters they supposedly hate with a passion – as ‘Scummers.`

And remind me, again, which club it was caught shamefully stealing a very impressionable Scotsman from Essex?

In a good old-fashioned retaliation, I then saw this: a pretty little ditty in ode to City`s less-than-chivalrous conduct, printed by Des Kelly in his weekend Daily Mail column.

After all, why should we waste time inventing more pointed purple prose than has already been published, when paid members of the real-world media will quite happily do it for us?

Besides, these cooking instructions at least seem an apt closure on the whole farce; Kelly writes:-

Here’s Delia’s Smith`s recipe for ‘Canary Stew’:

Take locally sourced ingredients.
Throw into frying pan.
Sling straight into fire.
Remove when barely done.
Stuff thoroughly.
Add garnish.
Drop straight into bin.
Order takeaway from Colchester.


Won`t somebody please pass me another tomato?



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